Shared an intimate moment with Rod today, of which I am truly grateful. It's been awhile since we had a little of the heart to heart talk. Out of the blue he told me that he doesn't think that taking on "Entrepreneurship" (as a major) is a good thing as it might prove pretty useless since he doesn't have a business venture. It came out of nowhere but same as every conversation we have, everything just flowed and is effortless. I told him why not as his Tatay have a business. He could take it on. He told me he is not so sure about that. I'm thinking he must meant he's not sure whether that is where his interest lay.
I told him, follow where his passion lay. I reminded him about how he was as a kid, renting out his Disney DVDs and having managed to sell his "drawings" and doodles to other kids for 5 pesos! Haha! That made him laugh. And then he asked if he could change his mind if he finds out it's not for him. In a heartbeat I told him, "Yes, of course." Without hesitation. I felt he would need that reassurance and that it is more important than my worrying about "wasted time" and further "resource requirement" which actually translates to monetary constraints. But then again, no "unfolding" is wasted time. If Rod needs more time (and yes resources too) to help him better "define" himself then so be it. I trust that the universe will just "supply" everything else.
That whole conversation provided me an insight as well as to how I am as a mom. That I did not hesitate at all in telling him that of course it is alright, was a bit of a revelation for myself as well. I love my son. Every situation that unfolds between us is showing me just how much and the things that I can do/ decide on out of that love.
Right now, I'm learning that currently, I'm defining maternal love as being able to open possibilities for my children. Isn't that why I work so hard? Why I take on certain sacrifices and affording myself some opportunities as well. The former, in order to save enough so as not to water down their dreams just because we have financial constraints. The latter, in order to demonstrate what chasing after a dream looks like; that it's perfectly alright to also pursue one's passion and to make things happen for oneself; that, that certain balance can be achieved if one just remain steadfast, focused and works hard.
I am not a perfect parent. I am privileged as well to have an able and very enabling partner; and steady support system as my Mom and the entire family. Things are easy for me because I'm loved and love flows to me from different channels. This enables me as well to give back/ spread love in return. It's a never ending cycle. And what a wonderful cycle to be in. And I am humbled by this all. So grateful. Thank you, God.
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